2000-12-11 - 14:58:48
Romance, pantyhose, and work: Recipies for frustration

*sigh* I ranted not horribly long ago about friends making assumptions about me and my thoughts and attitudes. Today I recieved an email from Mr. First Boyfriend making yet more assumptions ... worthy of another rant from me. I emailed him back instead, and worked most of it out of my system.

I must make a disclaimer to the readers I personally know, though. (I hate having to make disclaimers!) I do not compare my friends to each other. If I describe in my entries someone I know that you don't, you may NOT assume that I am mentally comparing him to you.

Everyone I know is unique. Everyone has their own set of quirks, their own categories of positives and negatives and endearing moments. You can't try to sum them up and compare the totals; life just does not work that way ... for me, anyway.

Every single person has infinite value ... yes, even Mr. Second Boyfriend, who is responsible for some of the worst moments of my life. We were spectacularly incompatible in the end, once his real personality became apparent. But somewhere out there, women actually look for men like him. One day, I'm sure, he will be happily married ... and I don't begrudge him that. I am long past my bitterness over his actions.

Back to Mr. First Boyfriend ... I am closing the book on that romance for good. Stapling the pages together. Sealing the edges with wax. Throwing it into a bottomless well. The certainty I was lacking has returned. I hate being practical, but if there was ever a time to take that road again, it has passed. Now we understand each other again.

*shrug* Now that weight has passed from my shoulders, and I am free to focus my worries on something else ... *grin* It seems there is always something to worry about!

This time it shall be my novel, I think. I've begun writing it again. The plot details have changed substantially since I first thought of it ten years ago ... but the world is the same, the main characters are the same, and the overarching theme of it is the same. Anyway, I'm less than a dozen pages in ... and getting the old familiar reread-and-rewrite urges every time I sit down to write some more. At this rate, I'll never get anything done!!!

Topic change ... Back to the pantyhose issue. I discovered that there is, indeed, a brand for women who are tall and non-waifish. It's a special Leggs sub-brand that comes in A-B-C-D instead of A-B-Q. Unfortunately, it only comes in white shades and black shades, none of the brownish (nude to coffee) shades at all. Ah, the injustice of the world! I refuse to buy any of that Just My Size stuff, it makes me feel enormous!

*rubbing forehead* Ah, another request for help. Last week I was asked to transfer all our document-based budget worksheets to Excel, so totals would be auto-calculated. This week, everybody is confused ... seems nobody really understands Excel. (Honestly, what's to understand? I put the totals on and everything! All you do is insert a line, type the price in the Cost column, and wha-BANG! There it is!)

Back to the grindstone ... I wonder if I'll have any of the "miss angel" patience left when I leave here. *grin*