2002-04-23 - 10:48 a.m.
Okay, now I'm really upset.

If you're interested in how I felt two hours ago, including my Dr. Pepper adventure and the package I got from the LaPorte ISP, click here.

At the moment, I'm about to burst out of my skin. Fuck health insurance, I need out of here now. Yesterday was a better day than most have been lately; I got to design a new, smallish database from scratch for a friend of mine in Quality Assurance, and I added new functionality to another small database for a gal in Employment Services.

When I reported to my boss about my work this morning (she was gone yesterday) she told me that I shouldn't do that anymore. My job isn't to do database work, even though I enjoy it. If people ask me how, no matter if it's a lot harder than anything they could manage, I'm supposed to teach them how to do it.

It's not my boss' fault, really. From her point of view, everything she's saying is perfectly reasonable, and she made it clear she's not upset with me; rather, she's upset at others for "taking advantage". The result was the same as if she'd blamed me, though; I felt instantly guilty for enjoying myself while doing something I'm not supposed to, and then I felt furious because I'm not supposed to do anything I enjoy. Right now, I just feel nauseous.

Bad job fit. Bad! GET ME OUT OF HERE!

And the worst part is, I really do like the people. Nice ladies. Even the men are nice, except that they tend to give me that Male Look, which is annoying. They're twice my age and have significant others or wives. How am I supposed to respond? I have zero experience in meaningless flirtation.

*shaking fists at ceiling*