2002-07-25 - 4:08 p.m.
A collection of thoughts beginning with P: Packing, panicking, purple, and panthers. =)

The amount of stuff I've accumulated in my time here is less than impressive. One desk and one cupboard, currently empty. The contents thereof, filling about three smallish boxes. One computer and assorted equipment. One telephone, one mirror, and one filing cabinet half-full with my boss' paperwork.

Her office, on the other hand ... *laughing* I must have wrapped up forty or fifty cords yesterday afternoon that had just been piled loose on a shelf. Keyboard extension cords, mouse extension cords, monitor extension cords, monitor power cords, computer power cords, telephone cords, printer cords, you name it, it was in there. I rubberbanded each into its own neat bundle and tossed them in a box with about seven spare mice. And that was just one box; I packed about twelve total yesterday and the day before. Said boss is packing even more right now.

Apparently she's forgotten about the six-month review, or at least put it off. Not one word passed her lips about it today in the meeting, and I sure as hell wasn't going to mention it. Although I suppose I should by the end of the month; if I'm getting a raise, I don't want to wait any paycheck-periods longer than I have to. OTOH, if I'm not, do I really want to know? *sigh*

On that worrisome note: I have my AD/HD doctor's appointment on Monday, from 1:30-3:00 in the afternoon. *gulp* I don't know how I'm going to handle that, but I did it to myself, so come on, girl, buckle up. It can't be too bad. Mom always used to say, think up the worst result possible and then you'll see there's nothing really to worry about.

In this case, the worst result possible is that the doc tells me it's all in my head and I'm just lazy, clumsy, and unmotivated. But considering the documentation and symptoms, I doubt that's a likely result. Bad option number 2 is that he tells me I'm just depressed again and puts me back on Zoloft. Also unlikely, since I'm really *not* depressed, just frustrated, and it's been more than four years since I threw away *that* medication.

So. Seriously. *smacking self across the face* Ah. Okay. Attitude readjustment in progress; optimism peeking over the horizon...

Damn. Now I've got that song stuck in my head. "The sun'll come out, Tomorrow ..." Bah. Is there such a thing as a good-natured humbug? I seem to enjoy making glowery faces at overly saccharine things, while secretly grinning on the inside.

Today I'm wearing a black skirt printed with flowers in shades of lavender and sky blue, with grass-green stems and white splotches apparently meant to be fanciful leaf-shadows. I have two shirts that go with it, one a ribbed black tee and the other a feminine little hand-wash-only knit top that matches the flowers. (Have you ever noticed how many nice girls' clothes require special processing? Irritating). I was feeling more feminine than funereal today, so this is me, wearing blue.

This is actually Outfit #4 out of a collection of six appropriate warm-weather business outfits. Pathetic, isn't it? I'm getting tired of wearing them one after the other in rotation. Next time I go shopping, I really had better knuckle down and buy clothes. And not opera-date clothes either, although *that* dress was truly a bargain gem.

Speaking of blue, there's a jay outside my window acting strangely. Bet there's a nest somewhere nearby. That probably explains why the squirrels have gone missing. Jays are enough to scare even my cat, and she's a fierce little would-be panther when it comes to bird-hunting. She's got the coloration for it, too; fur that looks absolutely black indoors, but you can see brown patches underneath when she's in direct sun.

*glancing at the clock* Okay, I've wasted enough time talking about absolutely nothing. Time to knuckle down and at least appear to be working. =)